Whod you bang
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
Randomize
