garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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