I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
