If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Randomize
