Don't you send me to vm
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
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