All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
Randomize