I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
Randomize
