you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
Buhtt sex?
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
They took my balls.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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