Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Randomize
