i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
Randomize
