Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
