Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Randomize
