my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
Naked. naked and bneed help.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
Randomize