I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
Randomize
