There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
Randomize
