Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
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