I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize
