It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I was so drunk I accidentally put in two tampons.
I tried to talk you out of it. You were worried about alcohol being a blood thinner.
Did you just see the Batmobile???
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Randomize
