yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Randomize
