I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
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