Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
