I'm jealous of your bromance
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
Randomize