Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
we're so committed to being not committed
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
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