my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
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