I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
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