STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
Randomize
