Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
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