with your own penis?
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
Randomize
