So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Randomize
