So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
Randomize
