I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize
