If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
Randomize
