After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
Randomize
