I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
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