I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
