you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Randomize
