somebody snuck up and got me drunk
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
