Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
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