that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
tell me about the fingering
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
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