this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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