Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
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