Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
don't take this the wrong way, but I'm not drunk but I need you to take me to the ER and you're the most likely to not be drunk now.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Randomize
