shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Randomize
