Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
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