it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
Randomize
