apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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