you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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