i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
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