butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I swear to god I'm with a high end prostitute right now and shes the most interesting person I've ever met. She just took me in to share an evening.
And as an added bonus she seems to have gotten a blood stain out of my favorite t-shirt
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
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