she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
Randomize
